Rainbow Bridge

It’s been nearly a month now since Shadow had his seizure. Looking back, I am very grateful that it happened when both Logan and I were home with him on that fateful Sunday evening. In fact, not only were we home, we were both within feet from him – me in the doorway and Logan in the den. I realize now that if it would have happened while we were at out or even upstairs by dad, we would never have really understood what had taken place. It’s funny how such afterthoughts can bring comfort during sad times.

On Monday, we had left Shadow with our trusted vet for overnight observation. It was on Tuesday, when this story starts. I had shared with my boss Carol our ordeal. Being a serious dog-lover, Carol reminded me as I stood in her doorway on the way out, to do be strong and prepare for this difficult decision that may lie ahead. (Carol and I have worked together soon to be 18 years and have very few filters within our communications.) I looked directly at her and said, “I’m not worried. I’ll have a sign when it’s time.” And within in one breathe and a hushed “oh my Gosh – look!” There over Carol’s head was a rainbow. I have never, I repeat never, seen a rainbow in Manhattan. Carol turned and said, “Well, there’s your sign - it’s Rainbow Bridge.” I was unfamiliar with Rainbow Bridge. Carol immediately googled it and printed it out for me to read.

Rainbow Bridge

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge. When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable. All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.

The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind. They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster. You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart. Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together ~Author Unknown

As you may have read on a previous post, Shadow went on to live two more weeks. We had some good and grateful moments and memories in this short time. And when it was time, I knew it with every ounce of my heart, soul, and mind, as did Shadow. Both of us had taken the time to say good-bye to each other during these precious weeks. Logan too had the time he needed to accept the inevitable.

I’ll end this story with today’s discovery. Working from home, I finally called over to the pet crematorium to set up a time to pick up Shadow’s ashes. Now, I had been in contact with the crematorium three times and never knew them as anything other than the pet crematorium people. You could have knocked me over with a feather (or rather large pillow filled with feathers) when the woman gave me directions to this industrial area and said the name on the awning is…wait for it…Rainbow Bridge.

Now, a logical person would say it’s a marketing gimmick. Embracing my inner beliefs and holding on tight to my intuition and knack of seeing signs, it was much, much more than that. Maybe tonight, I will be able to sleep after saying out loud, “good night Shadow, I love you” without tears on my pillow. For years, this was how I ended my days each night with Shadow at the foot of my bed. Maybe one day it will turn to a quiet whisper, then maybe a thought, and finally a gentle memory.